a lot happened, little happening…

I went to st. louis for FIRST robotics championship. a lot happened there. I saw my friend Gage again, I met Chris and Austin. I hung out with Gage most of the time, I didn’t really want to hang out with my female roomates, iv had enough drama already. there was so much drama plus me feeling home sick, and missing my boyfriend. I hadnt spoke to him since I had left, and before that I hadnt really talked to him in a while. I was so overwhelmed by everything that I was in the stairwell after curfew crying some, and trying to call my boyfriend cuz I seriously needed someone to talk to. but he wouldn’t answer, I do understand though, it was late, and he was probably asleep. I just needed to talk, I ended up leaving a long voicemail. I hadnt gotten much contact from him since I left. no one from back home really texted me besides my mom. a couple good things that happened there besides hanging with Gage and the other guys was I met Morgan Freeman, and I saw Will.i.am and the black eye peas perform at the championship, along with Willow Smith.

• now im back home, still havnt got to spend time with my boyfriend. he’s so busy lately. but even when he’s not, it seems like he’s been ignoring me. im starting to worry. at first I thought I was the only one to notice that we have been growing apart lately, but today at lunch when I was looking for him, I ran into Dillon and asked him and he mentioned that he has been noticing it too, and asked if there was anything wrong. I was talking to Carly and Tiff bout it earlier today. me and Anthony hadn’t really hung out since before Easter. that was also the last time we kissed. the one from before I left for st louis doesn’t count because I basically had to take it from him and beg… he didn’t want to kiss me… idk whats wrong… and when I got back, he acted as if I had never left. he barely paid any attention to me, neither did anyone else. but for once he lended me his shoulder to cry on. he rarely does that… we can’t hang out this weekend either. im gonna see the Happy Daze play friday and I doubt he will go with me. he has work saturday. I had a nice date planned for us for sunday, but then I realized its Mother’s Day. I really miss him… it feels like I havnt seen him in a month. I feel like im losing him… im scared…